Last night, my Red Hat friends and I went to a Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the $10 bill and stuck it to his butt cheek! Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill. She called the guy back, licks the $20 bill, and sticks it to his other butt cheek. In an attempt to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a $50 bill, calls the guy over, and licks the $50 bill.
I'm worried about the way things are going, but fortunately, she just stuck it to one of his butt cheeks again.
My relief was short lived.
Seeing the way things are going, the guy races over to me! Now everyone's attention is focused on me, and the guy is egging me on to top the $50. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet.
What could I do?
The woman in me took over!
I got out my ATM card. . .
swiped it down the crack of his butt. . .
Grabbed the eighty bucks and RAN!
If I could find a way. . . I admit it: I'm an addict. I drink so much Mountain Dew, I should bleed, shit, and piss neon yellow. I blame this habit for my twisted sense of humor. . . but I'll never stop, it's too much fun!
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